I don't know how often Bill "craves" the company of men who sit for hours in bars becoming increasingly inebriated, but if it is more than "occasionally," then I agree you may have cause for concern.Because of the language in your letter, it appears you are already familiar with alcoholism and how it affects relationships.He had an episode a week ago -- the third during the time we've been together. I love Jared, but if I have to endure another instance of this I don't think I can go through with the marriage.I'm still angry about the last bout, and he's still guilt-ridden. -- CONFLICTED IN PENNSYLVANIAWhile Jared may be able to handle his liquor 364 days a year (now), what happens on that 365th is a deal-breaker.One of the oldest Gay Alcoholics Anonymous meetings in the nation, dating from 1974, holds meetings at the Steps Alano Club.Today is the day we have an opportunity to discard destructive old habits for healthy new ones, and with that in mind, I will share Dear Abby's often-requested list of New Year's Resolutions, which were adapted by my late mother, Pauline Phillips, from the original credo of Al-Anon: JUST FOR TODAY: I will make a conscious effort to be agreeable.Wisdom comes to a man who lives according to the true eternal laws of nature."DEAR ABBY: "Bill" and I have gone together for three years.
Following three years of planning and fund-raising, the Steps Alano Club proudly opened its doors at 1935A Park Ave. For more than 17 years the Steps Alano Club provided a safe space for LGBTA recovery at that location.
We have talked about taking our relationship to the next level.
I'm hesitant because I suspect he's a high-functioning alcoholic.
Unless you want to spend your life worrying every time Jared picks up a glass who he will be when he puts the glass down, draw the line now.
Tell him the person he becomes during these "episodes" is a stranger you have no desire to have anything to do with -- ever -- and if he can't guarantee that you will never see that person again, the marriage is off.